Monday, March 31, 2008

I AM D-O-N-E - FINITO

WELL - This is it....I passed my defense! What a great feeling. I was very proud of the presentation I gave for my defense and felt that I did a great job - I practiced my presentation at least 20 times...I was getting on my own nerves.

I think I am still in shock from the experience of standing in front of a room full of super smart doctors and presenting to them.

As always - Dr. P. is the best. I did look at him a few times during my presentation hoping to get a little smile that says "you are doing great" - nope. I think that he wanted me to sweat and feel the pain. No worries - it was well worth it.

I will continue to write in this blog. Hopefully I will be able to write about "fun" things in my life.

Until next time!

Thursday, March 27, 2008

D Day - Defense Day Countdown - 23 hours

Thanks for the comments on the previous blog.

Karen - I am sure you can relate to what I am going through since you have recently went through the same thing - much more painful - I don't think I could study to become a medical doctor...You finally did it, and I am so proud of you cuz.

Dr. Paul - I spend more time with you than my colleagues at work and my family and friends. Not that you are not a friend, but you know what I mean. You know me very well and you are so right - I am a total spaz. Hopefully after tomorrow you will not have to deal with me sitting in "the chair" in your office talking in circles. I do have to admit, we have had some fun conversations.

Bea - Thanks for the words of confidence - I am very fortunate to work with such an amazing person (although it is through phone/email/sametime).

Let's see - what am I feeling right now? - Dr. Paul claims that the Defense is very anti-climatic. Although I have been living with my research study for ~ two years, I am excited to present the findings to the committee and whoever decides to see me go through pain.

I have not been able to work out for a week (unusual for me), and I think that is why I am spazing out even more. I am going to hit up a Zumba class tonight to calm my nerves (maybe a bottle of vodka when I get home) - just kidding Dr. P. I promise to not show up tomorrow with a hangover.

I have been receiving a ton of email and cards from friends who are cheering me on through this Defense. It is good to know that there are great people who are looking out for me and supporting me. I have received some great advice, a good luck bean plant, and many hugs.

Thank you everyone.

I hope I can post on Saturday morning (maybe Monday) that I passed the defense.

Until Next Time!

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Dissertation Defense is Scheduled

I just received the email today that my dissertation defense is scheduled for Friday, March 28 at 4:00 p.m. I have to say....I was very close to running to the rest room to get sick. I am a complete MESS! I thought I would ease my mind and jump online to review past dissertation defensers and their advice/comments/horror stories. I read many, and I am praying that my defense is not as bad as some that I read. I have the same emotions that everyone mentioned in their blogs - WHEW, I am normal. Everything from feeling like a complete idiot to reviewing your data and nothing makes sense. I have experienced feeling confident that I use more than 10% of my brain, and I have also felt that I only use 1% of my brain. I have had many ups and downs - from euphoria to low self esteem - excitement to depression - no stress to too much stress. Maybe if I was not working every second of the day and my personal life was not so complicated, the whole experience may have been different. Of course, it is all about the attitude, and I am trying very hard to be positive.

As I have mentioned many times before, Dr. Paul has been absolutely amazing. Anyone who can put up with my anxiety is a saint. I do not freak out (Dr. Paul may beg to differ), but I am extremely anal and ask a lot of questions.

Well, I am going to continue working on my presentation for the defense. I will send an email to everyone the week of March 31 to report whether I passed or failed my defense. Please say a million prayers for me because I need them. I love you all.

Until Next Time!

Sunday, March 2, 2008

COMPLETED DISSERTATION - FIRST DRAFT

OK - I HAVE OFFICIALLY LOST MY MIND - SERIOUSLY. I can't think of one more think - no more reading and writing - I CANNOT TAKE IT ANYMORE.

Well - A LOT has happened in the last 2 weeks. I inherited a cute little stray cat - found him on the side of the road about a mile from my house. I could not leave him out in the cold. I was not planning on keeping him, just wanted to take him to the vet to get him cleaned up and checked for any creatures living in his fur. This poor guy - he was nothing but one big messy matted hair ball. I got his bal-- snipped, and brought him to my house to recover. I was trying to find a home, but you know how that one goes - yep - he is now part of the Armani clan. I named him Nico - all he wants to do is play with Sydney and Monet, and all they want is for him to go away. Anyway, he has now took over the house and has every cat toy in the world in every room. Like Sydney and Monet, he is a maincoon, so having three fur balls is going to be a lot of work.

As for school - I just sent over my complete dissertation (294 pages) to Dr. Paul. I love Dr. Paul to death, but he dropped a bomb on me last Monday and he asked if I could have my dissertation completed by March 7 - that was 11 days away and I still had 30 more days of work left. So, I took vacation days on Thursday and Friday - worked on my dissertation both days and spent all of Saturday and Sunday doing the same. MY BRAIN IS MUSH and I think my ASS grew bigger from sitting so much!!!! I am keeping my fingers, arms, and legs crossed that there will only be minor changes. He also wants me to defend my dissertation at the end of March - OK - when I read that, I thought I was going to have a heart attack right there at work.

On a serious note - Dr. Paul has been awesome. I am looking forward to working with him in the future.

Dr. Paul - I saw your comment about demonstrating Zumba in my defense. I think that would make the defense very interesting - I will add this to my presentation.

So - I am going into hibernation for the month of March - no joke! I will be making changes to my dissertation and preparing for my defense. Everything must be completed by April 15, and on that day, I will be a new person. Hopefully all of the wrinkles I inherited during this time will diminish.

OK - It is March 2 and I am officially in hibernation mode.

Until next time!